Not Ruining another Day.

 Not ruining another day

Suddenly its been a while since they left. You are finally learning how to live without them. It has been a while since you accepted they wont return. You know because you waited. You waited for too long. 

Then one day suddenly you randomly hear their name on the street.  By the most whisper by two giggling girl. You hear their name and your world stops still.  Your heart starts racing and your mind goes blank and everything runs back to your head. The memories, the tingles, the loneliness it all comes back again. Your eyes start tearing up and your grip on the coffee mug loosens. You bite your lip , yell at yourself to get on with it. But you just cannot. Not anymore. A lone tear makes its escape down your cheeks against your will. Just a name is all it takes.

You feel so shit because you thought you were past this phase. That you were stronger but yet again here you are. The same broken self after months. And you hate it.

 So you run in an empty bathroom and cry your eyes out. Promising yourself to never cry, not about that person at least. But you know that is a lie because their memories are raw in your head and their laugh your brain echoes their laughs in your ears and every time you close your eyes, their images replay. You get stick of them. So sick.

All your senses seem to be ditching you, punishing you. Like they are against you. Yet you wash your face and clear your makeup. Drink the now cold coffee in a gulp and walk straight to work while clearing your head. Deep breaths – In and out. 

You even as much as smile to the guard as he opens the door for you. And you smile a painful smile to your co workers. And you smile to everyone to hide your swollen eyes.

So the long day begins, you feel more powerful because you got up and you got yourself here even when, you were against yourself. Even when you were to the point of feeling physically sick. You didn’t let them ruin another day of your life. You took over your life for another day. You fought their memories. You fought them again.
And you are so proud of yourself.

And YOU are so proud of yourself.

Because you are moving on. You are moving on.

Hey guys, its a little long one here but seriously it is worth the read! Also here goes my third post for The Topic Thingie!

So here goes a short story on – Heartbreak–   In this case this one is about Moving on after the heartbreak!

Hope you like it! 😉

28 thoughts on “Not Ruining another Day.

  1. A wonderful piece about taking control and knowing who’s boss at the end of the day. Some days are so difficult but its important to reflect on what you’ve gone through to appreciate how far you’ve come.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I don’t think your story was too long. Well, but it’s good. Worth a read!
    Hey! check out my new poem.It’s also quite on the topic ‘losing life’. and give me your feedback. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. That was not long, not a burden and certainly not someone that does not deserve you. You are the world and all in it. You are the light many do not see. You are the person someone is lucky to meet. I can keep going. But you are my hero.

    Liked by 1 person

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